I watch the sunrise in my rearview window

Every morning as I drive to Richmond, I have the most pleasing opportunity to watch the sun rise, in all its glory, tinged with the metaphor of new beginnings. My chest feels full as I grab the air in and my throat tightens because a sunrise can have that effect on you if you believe you have been given another chance.

In a few weeks, with any luck, I will graduate from JMU's MS DLVE-SLP program. Currently I am driving to the VA hospital in Richmond where I am finishing up my fifth practicum experience, this one at the VA Polytrauma Center. The experience has been awesome albeit challenging.  Therapy requires a great depth of knowledge along with a quickness that doesn't always come easy for me. I work under a younger clinician who is mightly self-assured. It's hard to teach an old dog new tricks, especially when the old dog's brain is a little compromised. I struggle with chronic pain from neuropathy, auditory processing deficits, and a jumble of executive function-related residual issues. In sum, I'm slow . . . but sure I need to work with the brain injured in some way so that I can share what I've learned and help others avoid the pitfalls I've experienced. I think I can, I think I can.

I am 58 years old and this will be my third master's degree. I'm about to start something new because I want to help others who live with brain injury and because I can't go back to museums or marketing. Wish me luck . . . and the ability to compensate more effectively with the residuals confounded now by the affects of aging.

Now I let go and meditate on things that are higher. The great, explosive, gaseous, buring sun will come up tomorrow and I will breathe in from it a reserve of strength that comes from knowing that the world, the universe that holds me in its force field is mighty. I go forth humbly, a mere mortal speck, putting one foot in front of the other. I will do my best. I cannot alter the ancient and powerful forces that swirl around me with so much surety. I can only strive to be at one with the force.

On Awareness

I have just returned from 6 weeks of summer school and practicum experience at James Madison University, as required by their master's program in speech-language pathology. In readings and in practice, I have thought about the dictum of Rhea Paul and others to create in the child an awareness of their language.

Between the demanding summer now past and what I sense will be a demanding fall, I have 4 weeks to adjust and realign. I am reading Coming to Our Senses: Healing Ourselves and the World through Mindfulness, by Jon Kabat-Zinn. Mindfulness meditation is a skill I plan to hone as I acknowledge what is (climate change, species decline, politics, over consumption, etc.) and live in the learning and doing moment.

And so, awareness. I live in awareness and I help children become more aware. Kabat-Zinn includes a chapter on awareness and I quote from it some pieces I want to remember:

"Awareness is immanent . . . but it is camouflaged, like a shy animal. It usually requires some degree of effort and stillness if not stealth even to catch a glimpse of it . . . You have to be alert, curious, motivated to see it. With awareness, you have to be willing to let the knowing of it come to you, to invite it in, silently and skillfully in the midst of whatever you are thinking or experiencing. . .

". . . This willingness to embrace what is and then work with it takes great courage, and presence of mind."

Changes and a Brave New Blog

Jamestown Rd. to Rt. 199

Blogging on Williamsburg Wordpecker has slacked off this summer and fall as a career move is taking up more of my time. You may remember that I wrote a blog post a year and a half ago about my change of direction and what prompted me to take it. Since then I've posted random thoughts about this new work I'm pursuing in speech-language pathology.

7:30 a.m. on the Colonial Parkway

To bring you up to date, I've been accepted to a graduate program offered by James Madison University. What fun! Really! I love the course information and my colleagues. The work is sometimes a pain in the butt, but I don't get too stressed. Thank heavens for my love of education and maturity. I know that life's a journey and I'm probably over the hump, enjoying the downhill ride. To me, the courses and the work in speech-language pathology are so much more exhilarating and fulfilling than the options: more engaging than early retirement and far less stressful than business!

8:00 a.m. - Crossing the York River

So far, I've enjoyed the people I've met as a volunteer at CDR and substitute speech teacher in Williamsburg-James City County schools while taking undergrad prerequisite courses. I am now in my second semester of grad school and have already found employment in this high-need field. A small elementary school in Gloucester was having trouble filling a speech position and offered me a part-time, provisional teaching position. Granted, there probably aren't too many young people who want a part-time teaching position in a rural community, but it's just about perfect for me. Part-time is all I want and my aging parents live in Gloucester.

5:30 p.m. - Coming home

So here I am. On the road again. Three days a week I hang a right on Jamestown Road and head to the Colonial Parkway and Gloucester. These days, instead of random thoughts about my yard, I'll probably be posting more often to my other blog. It's one I maintain through the school to communicate with parents about speech and language development.

Fortunately, about half of my 56-mile round-trip commute takes me along the Colonial Parkway where that part of me that yearns to be on the waterfront is satisfied. This October, the peaceful views are tinged red-orange. For now my photos are fuzzy and through the car window, but I may be stopping from time to time in the future to capture a more perfect shot.

fMRI connects city living with mental health

This is you brain on city living

I'm studying neuroimaging this week in my neurology course so clicked on a link that struck me in my Nature.com news feed. The authors of City living and urban upbringing affect neural social stress processing in humans conducted a study that showed functional magnetic resonance images (fMRI) to prove that stress affects the brains of city folk differently. This sort of stress leads to physical and mental health disorders. In their words: "Our results identify distinct neural mechanisms for an established environmental risk factor, link the urban environment for the first time to social stress processing, suggest that brain regions differ in vulnerability to this risk factor across the lifespan, and indicate that experimental interrogation of epidemiological associations is a promising strategy in social neuroscience."

Areas of the brain that are involved here include the perigenual anterior cingulate cortex (pACC) and the amygdala. The pACC region is involved in experiencing emotions and regulating behavioral as well as reacting to psychosocial stress. It may be the neuroanatomical structure that perceives social standing and thereby contributes to our mental and physical health. The amygdala is a part of the limbic system, which has been called the brain's emotional center. The amygdala is famously associated with fear and anxiety. It is connected to pathways responsible for defensive behaviors and it is the part of the brain that is responsible for emotional processing. In the city, these areas are always on alert. There, people are continually subject to the Shakespearean "slings and arrows" from bossy people and bad bosses. Saber-tooth tigers (cars, alarms, airplanes, and other such menacing noises) jump at them from every direction.

While the authors don't point to the flip side -- the physical and mental health benefits of one's proximity to a natural environment -- I'll do it here. Richard Louv might agree. As one who has personally benefited from re-establishing a healthy relationship with nature, I think I am physically and mentally better for it. I feel some sort of calming sense in my brain and body every time I get lost in examining the details of nature or get my hands, fingernails, and nostrils full of rich, fragrant soil. I would be in the portion of the study group that grew up in a rural environment and now lives in an urban area (population over 100,000). The study group that grew up and currently lived in an urban environment was of greater interest to the authors of the Nature article.

The authors conclude, "Our data reveal neural effects of urban upbringing and habitation on social stress processing in humans. These findings contribute to our understanding of urban environmental risk for mental disorders and health in general. Further, they point to a new empirical approach for integrating social sciences, neurosciences and public policy to respond to the major health challenge of urbanization." Ah, the far-reaching implications of brain research empowered by new neuroimaging technology.